Presidential yacht lost in mystery- Femi Adeoti column

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The mystery of President Bola Ahmed Tinubu’s yacht? Oh, quite deep! Deeper than our wildest, weirdest expectations. It might just be the beginning of an upheaval. Nobody can surely tell. It seems a long-distance race.
I admire this unanimous observation. It nterrogates the yacht and its masterminds. It situates it in its proper perspective. Sharp, brief and distinct:
“By the time we drill down the more and the full story of this
presidential yacht is unveiled, this supplementary budget may be just the variance payment. Nigeria might have paid triple or more (costs) for this yacht, etc. Idan (magic) is just beginning.”
Perhaps, this is one of the dividends of Tinubu’s acclaimed magic wand. It was flaunted in our face before, during and after the elections. It occupied every space, trending uncontrollably.
We were forced to swallow it. His “off-hand” inaugural speech gave him out on that. There’s no wand, not even magic, anywhere. All “na
packaging.”
That utterance still stands tall. It remains our greatest undoing
since Tinubu happened to our lives on May 29, 2023. It has not stopped troubling our lives.
We’re sinking deeper and deeper. Almost every second. The more we descend, the more we deteriorate. It’s one heavy cross we carry,
against our collective good.
We pray this cup will pass over us fast. And with the speed of light.
But they are arrogant. They refuse us our prayer. Insisting we must endure with patience.
And because they can’t live their words. We too give it back to them.
We become adamant. They are long on words, short in actions. They have huge confidence-deficit. Their account is in colossal shortfall.
On all fronts, credibility deficiency is their albatross. They are
frustrated. That is the junction they are presently. It’s a crossroads
of sorts. And we won’t pity them a bit.
The yacht is churning out some throw-ups. The mysteries are not only auseating but also irritating. They’re forcing them down our fragile throats.
They insist we must take it, hook, line and sinker! How possible that is? It’s another riddle engulfing Tinubu’s yacht. We’re no longer dummies. Neither are we robots. That era is far-gone. We won’t return to that Egypt.
We have made a startling discovery to our greatest delight. It’s
another of their puzzles. Synergy is it! We can’t understand this evil
collaboration at this critical time.
The solidarity is enormous and uncanny. It is beyond comprehension. Highly detrimental to our existence. Together, the curious trio is walking governance on its head. Odd? Yes, turning it upside down.
They are quick and steadfast. That’s is the urgency they accord their personal
needs. They pursue that with all the seriousness they devilishly
believe it deserves.
Their comfort is sacrosanct to them all alone. All the arms of
government are in tandem on this. The executive, legislature and judiciary. They are the arms in strange oneness. All for the wrong reasons.
The synergy is extremely strong. It’s unbreakable. They have become a cult unto our being. They form an unbearable ring around us. Nowhere no hide, no escape. And no viable alliterative either.
Where do we go from here? Nowhere in particular. We’re trapped. Our leaders are flying deadly kites. Yes,
dastardly games, with the only life we have. And they won’t stop
anytime soon. They’re not prepared for ceasefire.
Politics is one game they know how to play best. And awkwardly too!
Our desires are not theirs. We are poles apart, never, ever to meet.
That’s how they wickedly wired it. It is a deliberate intention.
Theirs are devilish and self-centred, based on greed. Ours are
honestly anchored on our dire needs.
By their vile fruits we have known them. We have identified and
isolated them. See their depraved intentions.
The palliatives they brought. They are bent on having them all unto
themselves. That was how their reciprocity was signed, sealed and
delivered.
Tinubu was caring enough. He consummated an N819 billion palliative. But he derailed almost immediately. He gave undue priority to his
co-members of the satanic trio.
He over-prioritised the National Assembly (NASS). To its members, he
dashed out N70 billion. They are just 109 senators and 360
representatives. Out of over 200 million Nigerians. Imagine the ratio!
Even more ridiculous and disheartening. The President tried hard to
justify his bizarre action: “It is to support the working conditions
of new members.” We simply chose to label it windfall. Why? These
characters, new or old, do not need palliative. Not in any form.
Then the turn of the National Judicial Council (NJC). Another
component of the privileged trio. It carted away N35 billion “only.”
The rest of us fell both prey and victims.
What happened to we, the lesser mortals, 200 millions of us? We would scramble for N500 billion. And these eerie leaders would decide for us the sharing formula. What absurdity! Very appalling.
Now, legislature and judiciary comforted. Tinubu felt comfortable to ome out with his own comfort budget. And it was a masterstroke. Trust the Jagaban of our time.
The total budget is in the region of a “mere” N2.176 trillion. It is
to be expended in less than three months. It must not exceed 2023. Its breakdown may stifle life out of you. You will be stiff and rigid at
the same time.
Let’s make a bold trial, courtesy, Daily Sun: “Four billion naira to
renovate President’s residential quarters; Aguda House to gulp N2.5billion; Dodan Barracks, official residence of Mr. President in Lagos,
N4 billion and official quarters of the vice president in Lagos, N3
billion.”
Purchase of SUVs at N2.9 billion for the Villa. Another N2.9 billion
to replace operational pool vehicles. Then N200 million to computerise
and digitalise State House. A computer village in the Villa!
Two vexed allocations stood out. Nigerians refused to gloss over them. That would be a monumental disaster if they did. The twin issues are
still trending. And that won’t stop soonest. Not in the farthest
future either.
They are upheavals the Presidency would contend with for long. They can’t be swept under any dirty carpet. They are not like any other before them.
It is a personal budget of immense luxury. Tinubu’s supplementary
budget is self-serving and self-fulfilling. A fleet of N1.5 billion
SUVs for his wife. And N5 billion presidential yacht for himself. All
in just one fell swoop?
More irritating, office of the first lady that does not exist! Ah!
“Amid a cost of living crisis for some of the poorest people in the
world.” We were taken aback. Shocked to the marrow. Tinubu just opted order luxury all the way.
Former President Muhammadu Buhari wanted that luxury badly. On May 10,
2023, just 19 days to his exit. He approached the same NASS. The
Senate in its wisdom denied him that luxury.
The Presidency wanted to play safe. Its hurried denial of the yacht is
particularly a bitter pill to swallow. It’s hard to believe. They should say that to the marines.
God must save this country with accelerated speed. The hawks and wolves are on the prowl. They are killing us dead! An ordinary supplementary budget padded so heavily with a yacht! And some queer
characters swore nobody in the Presidency was in the know. It’s mbarrassingly laughable.
The Presidency wasn’t honest with us. And we’re sad. Until Senator Ali Ndume came to our rescue. We were deceived point-blank. The Presidency simply threw the truth under a fast-moving train. It wanted it crushed to shreds. It opted to dwell in the deceit of old.They stoutly insisted Tinubu knew nothing about the yacht. But that couldn’t have held water.
The yacht was bequeathed on him by his predecessor. His spokesman, Bayo Onanuga, confirmed that as much. The “Smart Alec” in Tinubu
wanted to make a public show of it.
But Ndume was keeping watch. He moved swiftly and punctured the wild claim. Their plan collapsed like a house of loosed cards.
Against all odds, Ndume stood his ground. The President knew everything and all things about his yacht. He even desired it: “We
queried the amount budgeted for the yacht, but it was signed for a
dollar rate and the new rate isn’t favourable.”
And imagine Remi Tinubu putting insult on our oozing injury. She
slammed it on us without caring a hoot: “My family doesn’t need
Nigeria’s wealth to survive.” But you wanted to squander it all the same!
She told her “honest” mind on May 28, 2023, courtesy, The Punch. One day short of her husband’s presidential inauguration.
If truly your family is not poor. If you are evidently richer than
some states. Why this madness? It’s grossly at great variance with our
stark reality. Your husband dared us. We don’t deserve this treatment.
He arrogantly damned all the consequences, known and unknown. For reasons best known to him only. This goodwill he enjoys is waning. It may wear out faster than expected.
He was unwisely adamant. He went on to sign the budget yesterday. He gnored all the hues and cries. He snubbed us outright. He pushed aside our feelings and sentiments. That wasn’t stubbornness. Neither
was it audacity nor guts. It was sheer recklessness. And we’re not
afraid to say it. Not at all! In these perilous time of all times!
The trio is surely working against us. See the haste with which the
NASS passed the budget. Its contents were not properly interrogated. No robust discourse. No intensive debate.
They got what they wanted. They wickedly looked the other way. They left us to lick our festering wounds. They cover every facet of our
existence. They abandoned us to our unending woes. These bruises are in incredible legion. Samplers:
Volatile exchange rates; high cost of food items, commodities drugs
inclusive. High tuition fees, low school enrolment and japa syndrome.
Transportation and energy crises, increase in crime rate and
hyper-unemployment. Let’s pause the list here.
They left all these grossly unattended to. They cuddled frivolities,
pursuing personal aggrandisement. They kept grandstanding to our disgust. It’s repulsive.
They are foes, not friends. We have correctly identified them to our delight. Flee from them!
We insist they’re best isolated.